7 ways to lead by example and why it’s important
Leading by example is a powerful way to influence and inspire others. When you lead by example you aren’t pushing or forcing your team to towards excellence (whatever that may mean for you) you are showing them the level of excellence you desire in the way you lead yourself first.
The mark of any good leader, is one that is respected by others and spoken of highly when they are not in the room. Your personal brand is always in the room before you are, take of it and it will take care of you.
To lead by example is to guide others through behaviour, not only by the words, discussions, negotiations or dialogue that is going on – although these are important too. The way in which you communicate is often more important that what is actually being said. I think Maya Angelou captured perfectly when she said “people will not always remember what you said, but they will always remember how you made them feel”. Bearing this in mind when you are going into any kind of discussion or dialogue gives you an edge. Your tone, gestures and expressions are all behaviours and speak louder than any words.
When you take the time to lead others by tapping in and leading yourself first, it boosts the morale and improves the culture within your team. A healthy level of morale and positive team culture do absolute wonders for the loyalty, performance and productivity; it’s win, win for everyone.
Here are 7 ways to lead by example
Model behaviour you want to see
If you want to encourage a certain behaviour in others that either work with you as peers or are members of your team, be sure that you are exhibiting that behaviour yourself. People are more likely to follow the example of those they admire and respect.
Tip 1: Take a few minutes every day to be present with yourself and understand the currents of thought and behaviour that are going on both in and around you. It only takes a few moments to acknowledge how it’s impacting you (if at all). Doing this enables you to stay on top of your mental and behavioural game, making it easier to identify where you’re not walking the walk. It’s important to be honest with yourself if you do find that the alignment is a bit crooked, start by working backwards and figure out what may have triggered a different behaviour than the one that you wanted to show. When you identify it, address it, so you can acknowledge quickly if it comes up again.
Tip 2: Find someone that inspires you and invites you either directly or indirectly to level up and be the best version of yourself, in line with how they lead others. This doesn’t necessarily need to be someone that you know personally. It could be someone that you admire from afar like through an autobiography you may have read or an interview on podcast or TV show that you listened to.
Be open and transparent
Be open and transparent about your values, goals, passions and motivations. This can help to build trust with your team and colleagues and show them what you stand for (and what you don’t) Trust is fundamental to relationships and relationships are fundamental to your ability to influence as a leader. And nothing will destroy it faster than a lack of transparency. In the workplace a lot depends on the health of your relationships as well as the quality and reliability of your work.
Building trust (through your actions and deliverables) honestly takes time and it’s always a two-way street. You also need to feel that you can trust the people around you that you want to be build rapport with, to be open and transparent. Knowing your own values and passions as well as what you want to achieve, makes it easier to establish a good foundation with others. You’ll find you most likely have common points of interest to talk about, similar motivations and experiences to discuss.
Tip 1: The most important relationship you need to invest time and energy into is the one that you have with yourself. As a leader – get clear on your goals and motivations and know intimately, your values and strengths. This does take time and also effort, like any good foundation, the return on it will repay you tenfold, I guarantee it.
Take responsibility for your actions
When things go wrong, take responsibility for your actions and be accountable for your mistakes. This shows others that you are willing to take ownership of your them and that you are committed to doing what is right (rather than being right).
This is a big one. It certainly wasn’t something that I embraced in my early years I can assure you. The funny thing about not owning your stuff ups though, is that horrible sinking feeling in the pit of your gut stays with you for a long, long time. Pretty much until you own it. The discomfort as far as I’m concerned (personally) is just not worth it. I’ve found, there is nothing more liberating than putting your hand up and being accountable.
We are in the modern age of failing fast and applying lesson learned. Culturally, failure isn’t viewed anywhere near as negatively as it has been previously in most industries. There are of course professions where a mistake or failure can be life threatening, I’m certainly not considering those sectors and professions here.
Tip 1: Remember, success is a poor teacher. Owning your mistakes and failures empowers you to take charge with increased confidence and knowledge.
There is nothing like discomfort and the feeling of wanting to crawl into a hole and hide to remind you of what not to do (again) next time round.
Tip 2: If you are not prepared to fail, you are not ready to succeed. Most successful people have failed more times than they have succeeded. It’s a part of your growth, learning and development. How will you know who you want to be without the contrast of knowing who you don’t want to show up as?
Practice what you preach
Be consistent and authentic in your actions and words. If you tell others to do one thing, make sure you are doing it yourself. Misalignment between words and actions is a breeding ground for dissent and diluted respect. Authentic and consistent words and actions help to build your credibility and shows that you are trustworthy.
One of the most important responsibilities of a leader is the nurturing of a positive and productive team culture. Culture is the combination of the hundreds of tiny actions as a result of the collective and individual intention(s) of the group. Culture is everything. As the saying goes, it eats strategy for breakfast. When you’re not showing up consistently and respecting yourself and your team as an be authentic leader, you’re giving them permission to do the same not only to you, but also to others both within and outside of your team or organisation.
Tip 1: Be yourself. I’ve read all the inspirational quotes around about ‘Be yourself, everyone else is already taken’ etc. There are so many, and some are shallow and self-serving. In all honesty, it’s just bloody exhausting trying to be someone that you’re not. And people will pick up on disingenuous behaviour so quickly, because (subconsciously) it’s threatening. And then you’re in a whole new world of pain with lost trust, loyalty, credibility and authority.
Make it easy on yourself and just do you. All the time.
Lead by serving
Servant leaders share two fundamental beliefs:
- Every person has inherent value and deserves respect
- People are capable of accomplishing more when they are inspired by a purpose beyond themselves (they find it easier to get out of their own way).
These kind of people lead by serving others, rather than expecting to be served. This means putting the needs of others in perspective with their your own, and being willing to support another person’s personal growth and professional development, sometimes ahead of their own. The days of your team being there to serve you are behind us (in most cases), it’s about mutual respect and working together to support one another’s strengths and weaknesses so everyone participates in achieving the end result.
Tip 1: Actively listen to your peers, colleagues and team members. Be present, ask really good questions (when invited to) and summarise back to the person what you have heard, checking in that you are on the same page. Understand what it is that you can help them to achieve and then do it.
Tip 2: Mentor your team with gentle guidance, help them to learn the important skills (that you have) that will not only improve their performance but also improve them as people, without over stepping. Don’t use should or just, both those words need to struck from our vernacular. Show empathy, be compassionate and patient. Think about your language when you’re mentoring, the goal is to motivate and inspire using your experience as a tool and resource, not talk about yourself endlessly.
Embrace change
Be open to change and new ideas – especially if they are not your own. Encourage collaboration and team trust by being willing to experiment and try new things and adopt the key learnings from the process. This shows your team as well as other people around you that you are flexible, adaptable and willing to take calculated risks.
Tip 1: Change isn’t easy for some. Watch and observe your team as you introduce change and watch for signs of reluctance, hesitation, nervousness or defensiveness. If you see any signs of these, take the time to individually talk through their concerns and how you can work with them to help them to overcome what’s holding them back. This is as much an opportunity for their growth as it your own. This will take time, and managing your own expectations of the process will help everyone in the long run.
Encourage personal and professional growth
Demonstrate to others your own path to growth and development and encourage them to do the same for themselves – by taking their own path, not yours. When you invest in your own development, you are indirectly supporting the growth and development in others.
Tip 1: Each year map out our personal growth goals and develop a series of plans that will translate these into supporting your professional development. Personal growth is required before developing professionally, not the other way around. Remember that who you are is how you will lead.
Set a good chunk of time aside annually (perhaps October or November, towards the end of the year) and guide your team through the same process, so they are ready to start the new year afresh with a clear roadmap.
Here are some questions to ask yourself before during or after work to reflect and assess your own performance in leading by example:
- What’s going on for me right now both at work and outside of work?
- How am I feeling about what is going on for me?
- How can I show for my team today?
- What do I need to remind myself of (an affirmation maybe) if I feel wobbly?
While you’re at work
- How am I going today? Have I been demonstrating the standards I expect from my team?
- Is there anything I can do to improve my day and how I’m showing up?
- Am I focusing on the right things and making the best use of my time?
- What is the vibe of the team today? Have I really tapped in?
Leaders who lead themselves and others set a consistent standard of excellence for themselves and what they want their team members to model and follow. With a growth mindset and a willingness to serve and grow both collectively and individually, you can help each member in your team reach their potential.
And the hidden bonus in all of that is that reach yours too.
Liz Ellis is a certified Leadership and Performance Coach, Master Practitioner of Neurolinguistic Programming, Consious Hypnosis and Timeline Therapy. She is the founder and Principal Coach at Empowered Leader, a practice that supports leaders overcome role challenges and bumps in their career by reconnecting them with their vision and purpose.